One Year Living in Florida: The Honest Take

It feels insane to be writing this, but I have officially hit my one year anniversary of being a Floridian! To say the time flew by would be the ultimate understatement.

One year ago I packed up my life, along with my husband and 3 kids 3-and-under, and took a one way ticket south - unsure where we would ultimately land. We stayed in short-term rentals for months while we sufficiently explored the Tampa Bay Area - where we ultimately bought our first home along the iconic Bayshore Boulevard, and most recently upgraded to a bigger space as we anticipate the arrival of our fourth child in four years. It has been a wild ride!

A lot of people tell me they have been watching the journey. Many just curious, and some imagining what life might be like if they took a similar leap. To be honest, most people probably don't have the stomach for what we did. The risk was insane, to put it mildly. I was freshly postpartum, plus two toddlers, then left our beautiful North Stamford house (which hadn't even been sold yet), had no where to go, put my 13-year business on hiatus, sold half my possessions and loaded the rest in a moving pod, and relocated to Tampa after only one visit to the area. I did it on a gut feeling - but let's be honest, crashing and burning was also a possible outcome. But as they say, you've got to risk it to get the biscuit! But did I get said biscuit after all?! Here's my honest take after one year in Florida.

The pace is different.

And this was a much-needed change for me. It's certainly not slow in Tampa, but I've found that anything is slower than where I came from in the northeastern part of the United States. After a full year here, I can truly say my nervous system has finally regulated and I have chilled out... a lot. I am so much better (and healthier) for it.

Priorities shifted.

Getting out of the rut of the old routine really rewired me. It forced me to focus on the present constantly. This was partly out of survival, but also because I had to break patterns I'd grown accustomed to for so many years. The things that were most important became obvious, and my environment was no longer distracting to me, or challenging my values. I found myself in a place where I could clearly see and prioritize myself, my health, my family, and the things that truly added value to my life - while being largely surrounded by new people doing the same. It has made everything better.

Life truly is better in the sun.

I now understand part of what was "wrong" before I moved to Florida. The seasonal depression people talk (joke?) about is 100% a real thing... and really awful. I dreaded the long winters, frigid temperatures, and extended periods indoors. I hated being cold, laboring over the snow, and praying for spring to come early. Now, I still enjoy the seasons (another falsehood I was told Florida wouldn't offer - lie!), but they aren't harsh. I can be (and am) outside with my children every single day. There's something about feeling the warm sun on your skin and blue skies that makes you feel inspired, hopeful, and filled with gratitude. I am happy here every single day - and that is not an exaggeration. Our entire lifestyle changed from the moment we landed. There is no amount of money you could pay me to return to the northeast climate we left behind a year ago.

I am never bored.

There is so much to do where we live! Obviously, this isn't speaking for all of Florida at large - but here in the Tampa Bay Area, it is full of activity and fun! Most things free, or extremely affordable, too. I spent the last year here in constant awe of how many family-friendly things we get to do every single week that would have cost us so much money up north. Whether you enjoy city amenities, the beach life, being outdoorsy, fairs, festivals, farms, or all the bougie delights Tampa has to offer - it is a fantastic and beautiful place to live. I feel so lucky to get to call it home now!

People are indeed nicer in the south.

Another thing I didn't believe until I settled in here, people really are crabby around the NYC area. Maybe it's the weather? Maybe it's the culture? I'm still not sure. But I do know southern charm is a real thing now - and I love it and love that my kids get to grow up in it. People are polite, kind, and generous - as a norm. For months, I struggled with understanding this. It's almost embarrassing to share, but anytime strangers were nice to me here, I assumed they wanted something, or were going to try and rob me. :) I feel crazy that that's how my brain has been wired, and I'm slowly stripping myself of the gut-instinct that people you don't know are only nice to you if they want something. I now know it's okay to give and receive kindness for no reason at all. Kind of hard to explain if you haven't done the transition I've done moving to such a different place - but I've got to tell you it's a lot better being around nice people every day. It's made me a better person, too.

I no longer feel trapped.

I think I just got sick of knowing every day would look the same for the rest of my life. I wasn't happy in Connecticut. I'm sure it works for other people, but from the second I recognized it wasn't what I envisioned for myself and my family, I wanted out. I wanted out of every day - out of my work habits, my routines, my same weekends, the climate, the same places and faces... I was just done. Because I recognized that I was just surviving... not thriving. That's not a way to live. I try to explain this to friends and family still up there; some get it, some don't, and some don't want to. And that's okay. To each its own! But if you're reading this and have that same pit in your stomach that I had, that nagging feeling that you're curious of what a different life might look like, I implore you to listen. You will not regret it - and I am living proof of it!

I live life with purpose and intention now.

Having a restart as an adult is really cool. It allows you to take a fresh look at everything without the biases you've been surrounded by. For me, this meant the ability to challenge cultural norms and stigmas, give myself an opportunity to change and grow, and figure out what I wanted my days to actually look like and be filled with if it were totally up to me. Living in Florida really helped align things in terms of my values and the type of person I wanted to be. I knew it was time to evolve, and I also knew I couldn't achieve those goals where I was. My purpose is unequivocally to serve God, my husband, and my family now - not feeding my own ego, not climbing a meaningless corporate ladder or career accolades, and not rushing around from pointless thing to thing because it's what's "expected" of me. Now, I know who I am, I take pride in that, and I am able to surround myself with people that feel the same. I am not burdened by old wounds, stresses, and stereotypes, and I am not distracted by people and situations that no longer serve me. Every day matters, and it feels good to be in a place that embraces those same things.

I feel empowered and grateful for the ability to choose (and change) my future.

I knew I could do it, I just didn't know if I should do it - in terms of moving 1,200 miles away suddenly and flipping my whole life upside down on the hope it might turn out the way it did. I left behind all the family I knew well, the friends I'd accumulated through child and adulthood, the familiar places and faces, and saw the examples of many before me - who also grew up, came back to their hometown (or close by), settled down, had kids, and ended up "stuck" there, too. I was as rooted as anyone could be - especially with me and my husband having brick-and-mortar businesses in Connecticut. That plus very young children...

moving was hard. But life is about choosing your hard.

I knew the future challenges would be worse if I let things stay the same for the sake of my own personal feelings (delusions) of safety and convenience. And oftentimes, the hard thing is the right thing. From all of my research, I had determined Tampa, Florida was going to give me and my family the best chance at the kind of future we dreamed of. And honestly? It's even better than I could've imagined. I often joke with people that my neighborhood feels like you went back in time to the peak 90s - kids on bikes, families sharing ice cream, friends fishing off the pier, picnics in the park, fields and playgrounds full of children laughing all day long. That plus the never-ending beach days and picturesque sunsets, a well-run city, access to high-quality food, safe streets, and countless fun things to do every single day - Tampa has been a dream come true in every way. My children are thriving, and so am I. My husband shares the same sentiments and we often give ourselves a jump scare talking about what would've happened if we never took the leap one year ago.

I don't know what the future holds, but I can tell you this: the best chapter of my life began when I landed here, and I would do it all over again.